Do I Wanna Know?
by jedimasterroyal
Summary: Not a songfic. Inspired while listening to Arctic Monkeys' "Do I Wanna Know?" AU Clone Wars in which EP II did not occur but Anakin is still very much in love with a certain senator from Naboo and he really needs to know if she reciprocates those feelings.


_DO I WANNA KNOW?_

_Hey guys this is my first fanfic. I have been a lurker on this site since 2007, so you can imagine that I am a very currently shaking of nerves, but I finally got the courage to write and this is my first entry, its inspired by the Arctic Monkey's new song "Do I Wanna Know?". So credit goes to the them and Mr. Lucas for the awesome story and characters he brought to this world._

_P.S. This is an AU where Ep II did not occur and therefore Anakin and Padme are not married, but they are friends (more like acquaintances)._

_Without further ado..._

Being around her was intoxicating.

So you could say that in the duration of the present Clone Wars half of the time was spent being intoxicated, since she was always getting herself into trouble and he was always there to get her out of it. Their current situation brought them together in General Grievous' starship. Apparently she had traded herself in for Chancellor Palpatine in a valiant effort to ensure democracy or something. Anakin never really understood politicians and their tactics, but sometimes he wasn't sure if she really did do it for the sake of politics. Secretly he craved to know if she had done it purely because she wanted to be rescued by him.

He dreamt about her nearly every night this week, and the week before that, and the week before that, and for all the weeks since the day he had met her. She was the thorn in his flesh. She was the only thing that made his Jedi lifestyle a living hell. He had tried everything. He tried meditation and his mind always strayed. His constant thoughts were on her, especially now that they saw each other often. He even went to a brothel once, just to see if he could get her out of his system, but he only felt worse when he got out. His desires where not just sexual. Oh no, Anakin Skywalker had a full devotion to everything that was Padme Amidala.

"Come on let's get out of here," she said and gently touched his arm bringing him out of his reverie. She smirked, "Get that dopey look off your face, Obi-wan told you to hurry."

There was that too. She was always flirting with him. She kept touching him and hinting that she knew what he felt for her. That too had him on edge, because it meant that maybe she felt the same for him too. All this time, he kept waiting to see if she would court some other politician or man, but nothing. Of course there had been rumors at one point that she was perhaps in a relationship with a certain senator from Scipio but he had saved her from that one too. So no, she wasn't looking towards being with anyone. What was she waiting for then? Was there really no one in this galaxy that could love Padme (at least as much as him) and that she could love in return?

It was in these questions that his heart raced, that his speech stuttered, that he acted like an idiot around her. His whole being ached to know if the Force really had created her just to torment him or to be his perfect compliment. He admired her passion and work, only because he thought she worked just as hard as him if not even more. Surely, she was made to be his. Right?

Later on in the evening, after many death defying stunts and landing back at Coruscant, Obi-wan gave him the privilege of escorting the Senator back home. The speeder ride had been mostly silent, they were both weary from the previous events. His heart was sad. This ritual of leaving her at her home usually meant she would say thanks, give him some type of awkward gesture, and then go inside. No thank you kiss. No pulling in to have crazy thank you sex. No revelations of love that you can't say tomorrow day. Nope, nothing. And who knows, tomorrow the war could be over and he would never see her again or be able to rescue her again.

"Here we are milady. Home Sweet Home."

She smiled and even though it was night, it was as though all the suns combined shined behind her. He ran to open her door and she stepped off.

"Thank you, for everything," she placed her hand on his arm and turned around to enter inside.

Sirens blared in his head. Maybe she was waiting this whole time for him to make a move. I mean he was a Jedi, she couldn't just fall at his feet and declare her love for him without not knowing that she could easily be rejected. If she only knew that he would never break her heart. But if he declared his love for her right now, he would be the one that could possibly end up brokenhearted. Did he really wanna know?

"Wait!" She turned around. A confused look marred on her face.

"Have you ever drank yourself to oblivion and thought about comming me? Because I…I always do. If you ever once thought it was a coincidence that I'm the Jedi they always send to come help you, you are wrong because I always jump at the thought of being around you. I mean, honestly, I can't…I can't breathe correctly when I'm around you.."

"Anakin.." she started.

"No! No, no listen to me, ok. I'm sorry to interrupt you but I don't know if you understand that I'm constantly on the cusp of just shoving you somewhere to kiss you. Ok. I love you. I don't know if you have the same feelings for me. But if you wanted to be with me, we could be together. If you say the word right now, I'll leave everything behind. If you want this damn war to be over, I'll go and end it the fastest way I can. But right now I just need to know if you love me back."

She just looked at him. Her eyes looked angry or maybe it was passion, he wasn't sure. His head spinned. Finally the moment of truth upon him. His hands unclenched from his sides. She came to stand right in front of him and looked up right into his eyes.

He would finally know.

FIN

_And I'll leave it that :}_

_Please leave a review. I'm trying to become a seasoned ff writer. I'll post other stuff soon as well. Thanks._


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